What addiction has taught me!

So I was inspired by Nate Q's post

Why doesn't God just take it away? Why does it need to drag out so long?? Seriously, i've been going to SA meetings over 2 years now. I've done my therapy. I've done alot. What more?? Why not now??

I can say that this addiction has robbed me of so much in life...that it took opportunity and happiness away...and whether there is so merit in that...God is teaching me his gospel.

Here is what i have learned:

It is hard learning. But I am now much more willing and submissive. I am more patient (day at a time is frustratingly slow). I have to live more in the moment of each day,  I have to be present and aware of what I do each day.  I don't get to take little lust hits or daydream or fantasize.  I have immense compassion on people who struggle with ANY form of addiction. I understand more about the process of real repentance.  I now connect with my emotions and I TALK to others about them. I have to pray more, be closer to God. I have learned that importance of honesty and to confront the whole truth of issues.  I now enjoy connecting with others, even other men in personal and sometimes vulnerable ways.  I realize that in order to stay sober I have to live by gospel principles: love, humility, kindness, peace, being calm, letting things go, forgiving, allowing forgiveness.

This addiction has taught me the whole gospel.  And you know what...I have A LONG way to go. But I guess that is okay.  I still have to take this one day at a time. I still have to work the steps (which in reality...are simply working the atonement).

Day 30 today (well, it will be 30 when i complete the day....I go by how I finish each day).  I can't even think about tomorrow...I only have to live a life of sobriety and recovery TODAY!